Category Archives: MLB

Monday Ramblings

I have realized that it has been a while since I have posted, a very long while since I have posted anything on the Jays, for that I sincerely apologize, however they have been so mediocre lately, and that’s being generous so I have decided to move my focus elsewhere. It feels like cheating talking about other MLB teams, although congratulations are in order to Mark Bruehrle for tossing a perfect game the other day. Bonus points for making it against the Rays. Also congratulations are in order for Ricky Henderson and Jim Rice for getting into the Cooperstown.

I’m a couple of days late on this but that catch made by Dewayne Wise, a late inning defensive replacement, made an over the fence, home run robbing catch that almost wasn’t. Here is a video of it on YouTube shot by a fan and in surprisingly high quality, its great to hear the crowd’s reaction from great disappointment, to being back on top of the world again. This is the broadcast version.

One of the things that I like about Hall of Fame week, is all the positive light that is shed on the players. Sure part of the reason that they get into the Hall is because of their character, but there are also a lot of stories published that otherwise wouldn’t normally make it to the light of day. I read two examples of such stories that can be found on ESPN, one about Henderson being a much better team mate than anyone would have realized things like, asking to be taken out late in games so young players could get at bats and such. Another was about how Jim Rice saved the life of a young boy. Its nice to hear these stories, and its really too bad that they aren’t published more often.

I really like that Doc is getting attention, I also like that they aren’t going to trade him away for nothing, however, my opinion of the situation, will he be traded, won’t he changes about every five minutes. As it stands right now, I don’t think that he will. However there are still a few days for teams to collapse under the pressure and sign him. If he has to get traded, I’d love to see him go to my favourite N.L. team, the Dodgers if he does get traded, however my real preference would be to see him stay in Toronto.

Finally Michael Vick has been suspended four games by the NFL, and Terrel Owens isn’t very pleased about this. On one hand I think that T.O. is right, hes already been to jail, lost all his money, and been suspended indefinitely, so what are four more games really going to do. However, I still think that he should have to pay his time to the NFL. I think that more than anything this four game suspension acts as a deterrent from teams who would be interested in signing him, as they wouldn’t have him for the full season. To be honest, I would be surprised if he does play again this year, but I would not be surprised at all to see him in the UFL, or even in the CFL. To be honest, I think that the CFL style of football suits Vick’s style of play very well. But away from the game for so long, he is bound to have slowed down a little bit, and his arm sure won’t be as accurate as it as.

Until next time, keep on rockin and Rolen in the free world.

Thoughts on Doc

Is This the End?
Is This the End?

There have been two things in the last two days that have indicated that Doc is going to be traded. The first is his wife Brandy. Over the last three games she has been in the broadcast booth plugging the Lady Jays Food Drive. When the topic of Halladay being traded she was practically in tears. She was holding them back but they were still there.

Almost as concerning was today after Halladay’s complete game win he looked sad, happy because he won, but sad because he knew that this could very well be his last win with the team. If it was it was a great way to be remembered as a Blue Jay.

While both “indicators” are purly guesses, there is no denying how Doc looked today, sort of like the day of his high school graduation, he was happy for the moment, and knows he is going onto bigger and better things, but sad to leave all everything behind.

Now I have a conspericy theory. If Doc gets traded now and wins a ring, he might come back to Toronto after 2010. He has settled down here, and his wife and kids I assume are quite happy. I’m sure that they would rather raise their kids here then say Baltimore, or many American city’s. In addition, Brandy Halladay and their children could live with Doc for the rest of this summer and next, which means that they wouldn’t spend too much time apart, especially when you consider things like Roy being away for spring training and road games. Wishful thinking at best, but I hope its a reality.

I had a Dream

But it was really more of a nightmare.

Roy Halladay and Vernon Wells were traded to the Houst0n Astros for cash, prospects and first basemen Lance Berkman.

That is all, I have absoloutly nothing to base it on, I just felt I needed to share that with the world.

Half Baked All Star Ideas

With the MLB All Star Game on Tuesday and as always criticisms about the fans voting in players, and the winner determining home field advantage for the World Series I have a few half baked ideas to make the game better. Some are additions to ideas that have already been said, so I know that I am not original in my thinking, just my twists on them. Without further adue, here are my half baked ideas to make the MLB All-Star game even better.

Half Baked Idea Number One

Catch a break from the regular names with a little R&R, rookies and retirees. What the MLB All Star game needs is more mini games and competitions and this is just one, have a defense made up of rookies, vs an offense of all guys who are retired. The rookies play the field while the old timers bat once through the line up. The over under is 3.5 runs, with unlimited outs, if the old guys can score 4 runs with 9 batters and unlimited outs they win, if the young guys can keep them to three or less then the rookies win. The over-under score might need to be adjusted but it would be a chance to see your favourite veterans one last time, against your just drafted future.

Half Baked Idea Number Two

Have a free agent talent show. Let guys like Frank Thomas and Pedro Martinez show off that they can still, or can’t still play. All the big names from each team are in town so they get a chance to showcase what they have to everyone. With the trade deadline a couple of weeks away after the break, why not let the free agents show what they have left. They could have their own home run derby, pitch off, base stealing competition etc. which brings me to my next point.

Half Baked Idea Number Three

More skill competitions. Sure the Home Run Derby is fun, minus all the ads and the fact it takes a whole working day to play, but the skill competitions. The NHL has the fastest lap, hardest shot, accuracy competition with the breaking targets, so why not bring some of these to the MLB. They could have a base stealing showdown, I’d like to see runners on first and third both running to second, but I don’t think MLB would like the risk of injury, so have a runner on first and second both trying to advance. A spin on this could be a runner vs catcher showdown, where the pitcher throws a pitch out, and the runner has to beat the throw.

Another skill competition that I would like to see tests the pitchers accuracy by breaking plates that represent the strike zone. Have them break five softball sizes plates, one in each corner and one right in the middle without breaking any plates outside of the strike zone. For the second round, back the plates up so they are now throwing at a longer distance, have them throw from second or something. I’m sure the GM’s wouldn’t want their pitchers getting tired, but they wouldn’t be throwing for power so much as accuracy, again it would be goo for teams looking to shop their pitchers out.

By Lucas

I’m a Sports Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here

Did anyone see the show I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here? Now usually I’m not one for crappy reality TV, but it’s the summer so quit breaking balls and just listen.  The most competitive person on the show was John Salley. You know Salley; 4 time NBA champion, and the token black guy on Best Damn Sports Show Period. Anyway this got me thinking, what if there were only sports stars stuck in the rain forest of Costa Rica? Lets explore.

Michael Jordan:
MJ would be the favorite to win, after all, the guy went 6 for 6 in NBA championships, a reality show should be easy. He would do every single challenge with his tongue sticking out too.  However in the end, he would quit the show twice, and eventually come back on another less popular show, which further ruins his legacy.

O.J. Simpson
Who wouldn’t want to watch “The Juice” on this show. However he would be first voted off after America saw his one luxury item he brought from home was a poorly fitting black glove

Adam “Pacman” Jones
He’s gonna make it rain!! …..Only on this show the strip club is the jungle ………and the “rain” isn’t money……… but actual fucking rain.

John McEnroe
He’d be the guy who freaks out first. “What do you mean we’re out of rice!! I’m out there busting my ass…” His luxury item? Well it would be a picture of him with his beautiful 80’s hair. What do you call that anyway?

Anna Kournikova, Maria Sharapova, Danica Patrick, Jennie Finch, Amanda Beard, and Stacy Keibler.
Eye Candy. I’m not a shovinist, but who wouldn’t want to see any of these girls in some tight-fitting wet halter tops fighting it out in a food challenge?

John Madden
He would be the guy who eats all the food, and pisses everyone off because he’s always pointing out the obvious. “We’re starving because we’re not eating enough fried chicken.” But in the end he would stay on the island and loose at least 100lbs.

Bill Simmons
Yes I know he isn’t an athlete, but do you trust anyone else to document this amazing show? No, of course not. For that we need the best. Enter SimBo.

Charles Barkley
They got Chaz Barkley only because Shaq was too busy Twittering to come on the show. Barkley would bring his golf clubs as his luxury item, and would be working on his swing every day……and it would still look like an awkward grade 6 slowdance. Chaz would also place bets with Michael Jordan on every immunity challenge, eventually leading to Chaz loosing $ 230,000.

Coach Mike Singletary
Mike would fill the roll of the token old guy, who gives everything his best, but in the end just can’t pull it out. Plus who wouldn’t want more soundbites like this.

There you have it. One island, six women, eight guys, thirty cameras, and millions entertained. But who would win? Stay tuned everyone!

By Scott

A Rebuttal To Walker’s Thoughts on Chicago

chicago vs cleveland

Not too long ago, my main man Walker made an argument that Chicago was a town devoid of sporting success. However I happen to disagree and think that Cleveland has a MUCH MUCH worse sports history. So here’s my rebuttal:

Once again rebuttals typed by Lucas will be in italics.

First I would like the thank Scott for making his entire post a tribute to the late Billy Mays, using only the Billy Mays Key to type.

1) Chicago had a Dynasty with the bulls. DYNASTY!! there have only been a handful of dynasties in all sports combined, and the Bulls have a good chance to be the most impressive dynasty of all. In fact I’m going to work on an article about that right now.  Stay tuned Sports fans.

This is the one exception to the rule, where they lucked out. Think about it, without Phil Jackson, without MJ, or Scottie Pippen, would there have been the Bulls Dynasty. I’m sure that they would have been good, just not as good. Much like figure skating though, if you take away the top point the average score is still going to be lower than the average score of Cleavland. Without going into an advanced statistical analysis, the Bulls are skewing Chicago on the crap-o-meter. Take them away and they are worse than Chicago.

Walker you are a smart man, but this is the WORST rebuttal ever. You can’t ignore the fact the Bulls were great. Also you can’t play the “what if” card. What if Sam Bowie went to Chicago and Jordan went to Portland? What if the Bulls drafted Reggie Miller instead of Scottie Pippen? What if Tex Winters never invented the Triangle Offense? These Questions don’t matter because IT DID HAPPEN! Lets not over complicate things. It’s Chigaco 6, Celveland and depressing.

You are right, the Bulls are much much better than the Cavs, however, what have the Bulls done recently? That silence you hear is your answer. The thing is what this argument is coming down to is whose better, LeBron or Michael Jordan. The answer is clearly M.J. so Chicago had the much better all-star. However since we are not discussing who has the worst players, we are discussing the worst teams. Granted Jordan’s supporting cast was better than King James’, but time will tell, as James still have 10 good years.

2) The Browns have never been to a Superbowl, and can hang their hat on Jim Brown and only Jim Brown (By the way I love Jim Brown).  The Bears have countless great names (Singletary, Ditka, Butkus, Sayers, Payton Et Al.), legendary moments (fog bowl, Ditka vs. Ryan: two coaches one team, “they are who we thought they were” Et Al.), and possibly the best team of all time (1985 bears)

No but the Browns do have four NFL championships, and the 1985 Bears are a very overrated team. I like to think that the 1985 team was a fluke. Yes their defence was good, but it was figured out. Mike Ditka never made it back to the championship. Prior to the 1984 season the Bears didn’t win a divisional championship for 42 years. This includes the premerger NFL, and like the Chicago baseball teams could not capitalize on weaker, and less competition.

This is in the same category as above. Even if you think the 1985 Bears are “overrated” (Which they aren’t at all), they still won a championship!! And if you want to count long time struggles before success, shouldn’t we be arguing over the Pittsburgh Steelers? Or maybe the Tampa Bay Bucs? No matter how you cut it, Chicago has a legendary team and 1 Superbowl, the brown’s best known moment is “the drive” and that is just depressing.

There is also another argument to be made regarding which franchise is historically worse, the Browns or the Bears. The Bears were around 26 years before the Browns were founded. In addition the Browns had financial troubles in the 90s which means in the early 90s prior to their fold in 1996, they wouldn’t have been able to have a competitive payroll. Insert Moneyball rebuttal here. In addition to this, when they came back in 1999, they were a new franchise, which means they are starting from scratch so it will be at least another five years before they could be competitive again. These five years, three years of inactivity and call it two years of low budget mean that for another decade on top of the 26 year head start the Bears had, the Bears have a total of 36 more years of Franchise experience.

Also you can’t give the “5 years to get good” idea. The Panthers made the playoffs in their second season in the NFL. Jacksonville became perennial playoff contenders ONE YEAR after being founded. The Idea that anyone can win in the NFL destroys any argument of time in the league.

Fun Fact The Clevland Browns have the fourth most players in the Hall of Fame. In terms of expansion teams here are the most recent. The reason that I say you need to give  a new franchise five years is because thats the average NFL career. After this time, they have seen enough players and possibly personal cycle through that they no longer dealing with all the issues that new franchises go through.

  • 2002 -Since the Houstan Texans still haven’t had a winning season.
  • 1999 Cleveland Browns have been very slowly on the rise with strong drafting in recent years.
  • 1995 Caronlina Panthers are a lifetime 115-119 (109-115 regular season, 6-4 in the playoffs) since joining the league. After making the playoffs their second season, they did not make it again until 2003 when they lost in the Superbowl.
  • 1995 Jacksonville Jaguars are 123-112 (118-106 regular season and 5 -6 in the playoffs) since joining the league.
  • 1976 Seattle Seahawks
  • 1976 Tampa Bay Bucs

You get the point how teams are after they are brand new franchises.

3) The Cavs have no finals appearances. And I think they only have one maybe 2 division championships (I’m too lazy to google it). The Bulls on the other hand have 2 separate three-peats!!!

I discussed this above, Basketball is the one sport that Chicago is better than Cleveland at, but give that a few years. What have the Bulls done without Jordan? What Will Cleveland accomplish next year?

If you can’t play the “what if” card, you cannot play the “wait and see” card either. Again it’s a moot argument. Even if Lebron wins next year, and stays in Cleveland, he STILL is never going to be as good as Jordan. Jordan went 6 for 6 in the finals, and won Playoff MVP every time. Lebron is 0 for 1 thus far.

4) Maybe the Cubs are a little worse off then the Indians, but both are sad stories. Throw the White Sox into the fold and the two can’t be compared.

You’re right you can’t compare them, because once again other than 2005, the two teams have one championship in 191 years. And this includes an era when there were fewer teams, and players made much much less. This means that between the two of them they should have been able to fluke into a championship. Unfortunately neither of them did. Cleveland has twice as many championships as both of these teams.

This is a toss up but Celveland is still worse off. There are very few people alive who remember either the Cubs or Indians ever winning a championship. The vast majority of Baseball fans remember the Chi Sox winning in 2005. That breaks the tie.

It’s comparing a sd franchies, and one very sad franchies versus one sad franchise. You make a good point, but you have it all the way around. The Chi-Sox are the competition with the Cleveland Indians. One has a Championship recently, the other has a better history, but nothing recently, both are lose lose. To break a tie you look at a franchise that hasn’t won a championship in over a century.

But wait, there’s more! An original argument from Lucas.

Now I know we don’t talk about hockey, but we have to make this argument fair since we forgot one of the big four teams. Let’s compare the the two NHL franchises, The Chicago Blackhawks and the Cleveland Barrons. Who are the Cleveland Barrons? They were a tempoary NHL team after plans in another city fell through. The Blackhawks are the leagues worst franchise.

The Barrons did what they were supposed to, be a franchise for a couple of seasons, until they could find a permanet home.

The Chicago Blackhawks are worse than Toronto Maple Leafs and that is saying something. The Blackhawks have never won a championship. Technically they were the Black Hawkes when they last won the cup, after the 1960-1961 season. This means that in the next six years, when there were only five other teams the Hawks couldn’t win, let alone the 48 years since they won in 1961. Well the Blackhawks won before 1961 right? Yes, twice in 1934, and in 1938.

Overall Compairson the only thing that these cities are going to win.

Basketall. Give the Cavs Plus 6 + 2for 8(one for every championship the Bulls have won plus two for MJ being better than Lebron) over the Bulls, but I have a feeling this will be revisited a couple of years from now.

Baseball. While the Sox and Indians are even, the Indians, the Cubs break the tie with Plus 10 (one for each decade of drought).

Football. The Browns win this Plus 2 since they haven’t won a championship, but it is hard to pick on new franchises.

Hockey. For those keeping score we have a tie. Since nobody cares about hockey we’ll make this tie break one point. What’s the only team worse than a tempoary franchse? The Chicago Blackhawks.

Overall Chicago has been better in Basketball and Football, they have been terrible in hockey and one of their baseball teams, and pretty darn bad in the other. Sport for Sport its a tie, but Chicago has three terrible teams, while Clevland really has the Cavilers, and the Browns until 1996. Comparing the two is like a comparing a crap town (Cleveland) and a crap city (Chicago), the City will win each time. Even with the good, the Bears and the Bulls, Chicago still has more craptacular teams than Cleveland.

While it’s close Chicago edges out do to their amount of Crap.


Macho Mustache Madness

There are two ways two measure manliness in this world; sports and mustaches. The manliest of men balance both at the same-time, and this article is a recognizes those who have given the time to groom the finest lipticklers around, while being some of the most overpaid men in the world.

Major League Baseball

There is something about baseball that seems to attract men with mustaches. Perhaps some of it has to do that while sitting on the bench the players are left with little to but groom their upper lips. Or perhaps it has to do with the little known fact that before players wore eyeblack, they would just grow mustaches to keep the sun out. While there have been whole lists dedicated to baseball staches alone, I’ve tried to keep it even by selecting only the best of the best.

Brian Tallet. From the injury depleted Blue Jays pitching staff, Brian Tallet has worked his way from the bullpen, to the near top of the starting rotation. Some may credit this to his hard work, and determination he has shown in the bullpen, while others will say its due to the 47 injuries to the Blue Jays starting rotation Actually they have had 11 different started this season, but doesn’t the truth even sound made up?. I know that the real answer, and that’s because of how he came into the start of the season. About a third of the way through, he borrowed some chops from injured teammate Dustin McGowan, and grew a mustache two sideburn combo I like to call, The General.

Salvatore Fasano. For a backup catcher who can’t hit Sal Fasano has quite the fan base. The Fasano faithful are known affectionately as Sal’s Pals here in North America, and Fasano’s Pisanos in the old country. Fasano has quite literally built up his fan base soley on his facial hair. While doing his journeyman thing, Fasano got traded from the Phillies to the fun hating Yankees, he kept his stache…or as much of it as they would let him.

While he may look like the type of Harley driving and Jack Daniel’s drinking redneck you wouldn’t want anywhere near your child’s playground, the truth is Fasano is a hard working Christian who doesn’t drink and plans to study paleontology after he retires from baseball. Oh ya part of the reason he is still kicking around the minors is to help pay the medical bills of one of his children who was born with hypoplastic left heart syndrome. I can’t say enough about the man, so I will end with a shameless plug to his chairty Sal’s Pals.

Roland “Rollie” Fingers. With a name fit for a crunk-beat rapper, Rollie along with the next man on this list helped to define the closer position. Only Rollie bring back the waxed moustache, when he came into pitch his theme music was “I’m Bringin’s Waxy Back” by Justin Timberlake Sr.. He also had his number, 34 for those curious, retired by both the Athletics and the Brewers. Not only was he an excellent ballplayer he was a stylish individual who I’m sure made GQ’s best dressed list year after year.

Richard “Goose” Gossage. One final baseball player for the list, with some honourable mentions to come. One of the most dominant relief pitchers who helped define the closer position. Like Fasano, he was a journeyman and he made it all the way to Japan.  Unlike Fasano was allowed to keep his handlebar mustache by the New York Yankees. He’s also in Cooperstown.

Honourable Baseball Mentions

Jason Giambi – His was good enough to be endorsed by the American Mustache Institute, but he just didn’t keep it long enough to make the list.
Keith Hernandez. Not only did he make the list, he’s Keith Hernandez!
Al Hrabosky. Sure it’s bushier than Fasano, but I like Sal more, plus Hrabosky caved and grew a beard.

NBA/NCAA Basketball

During its heyday no sport boasted better ‘taches than basketball. The tradition is alive thanks to players and coaches alike. While there aren’t as many mustaches as in the NBA there  are some that are quite noteworthy.


Adam Morrison. While some say that this one should be in the NCAA category, but he does has a ring to boot with that teen-stache. When he was picked 3rd overall by the Charlotte Bobcats, many expected him to grow into a seasoned veteran, and possible illegitimate child of Tom Selleck. Sadly Morrison got injured, traded to the Lakers, and ended up with a ring. To add insult to injury, at 24 years of age, you can still see the forest for the trees, that is to say his mustache is still thinner than Jeremy Piven’s hair when he auditioned for the role of George.

Kurt Rambis the Greek God of upper lip hair. Funny having two Lakers on this list, but they know how to win, and they know how to stache it up. Rambis, who with those goggles, pedistache, and grainy black and white photos joins Fasano on the list of people you wouldn’t want hanging around your child’s playground. Rambis was a part of the Lakers during the years of rivalry in the 1980’s with the Celtics. I can’t imagine anything more intimidating then Rambis coming down the court ball in hand, stache on lip, and glasses on nose. Kobe’s scowl comes nowhere close. He had brief tenure as head coach in 1999, and served as an assistant under Phil Jackson, but not only is he a coach in real life, he played one on 7th Heaven as well. If Phil decides to step down could Mr. Rambis be back at the helm?

Stan Van Gundy. This years NBA playoffs brought attention to a few things, the aforementioned permascowl on Kobe’s face, a shot that meant nothing by LeBron James, and Stan Van Gundy’s mustache. If Van Gundy were to retire tommrow, even with this economy he would have no trouble finding a job, as his twin brother Ron Jeremy’s stuntman. At TSB I see what people have googled to come to my blog and far too many people have googled “Stan Van Gundy Penis”.

Honourable Basketball Mention

Larry Bird. The legendary Mr. Bird would have made the list, but his blonde beauty is just way to hard to see, especially with out HD video in the 80’s.

National Hockey League

Lanny McDonald. Pop quiz, what’s bushy, red, and described as walrus style? Times up, the correct answer is Lanny McDonald’s mustache. He played for the Leafs, the now defunct Colorado Rockies, and finished up his career with the Calgary Flames, and in 1989, a Stanley Cup championship. A career moment came for McDonald when scored an sudden death playoff goal to eliminate the New York Islanders in 1978 while playing for the Leafs. He did this with a broken wrist and nose, that was no doubt held up by that walrustache. Even in his once a year alumni public skate appearances, McDonald still sports a think red gray one.

Eddie Shack. Clear the track, its Eddie Shack! I debated putting Shack on this list because after he retired, he sold out. In an advertising campaign by Shick he was paid to shave off his duster. What a shame, but then again he did play in the era where players often had to hold down second jobs in the summer, and had nothing in the way of a retirement plan.

Wendell Clark. I swear I’m not being a homer picking three hockey players who had played for the Leafs. Instead of going for championships, they have gone clearly gone with style as all three of these mustached stick handlers have at one point played for the Leafs. Clark played for the Leafs during three separate tenures, and is most fondly remembered for his water-bottle launching shots and his handlebar mustache during the final days of Maple Leaf Gardens.

Honourable NHL Mention

Larry Robinson of the Montreal Canadiens, I just couldn’t hurt my Leafs by putting a Canadien on the list

National Football League

Despite boasting some of the toughest and hard hitting guys on this list, a good moustache is often wasted an an NFL player since they have to wear one of those pesky facemasks.

Jake Plummer. In his best season, Plummer sported the dirties sanchez north of Mexico. The Adam Morrison like dirtstache, that I’m willing to categorize under the sanchez style. His dirty sanchez was so popular that after he shaved it an online petition was started to bring it back. It was successful. The Mustache Gods frowned upon Plummer’s decision to shave though and his career was all downhill from there.

Mean Joe Greene. Joe Greene’s reputation preceded him the way lightning precedes thunder, on the field, and in the name. Once after a dirty hard hit on a QB the other teams bench started to walk on the field towards Greene. He and he alone walked back challenging them, and they backed off. Another time after a kid offered him his Coke he gave the kid his jersey, maybe he wasn’t so mean after all. Sure he had a beard during most of his career, but upon acceptance into the Hall of Fame he made the right choice.

Honourable NFL Mention

Andy Reid. Head Coach of the Philadelphia Eagles

Bill Cowher. Former Head Coach of the Steelers and current broadcaster